"The mind of the pauper is small because it is rooted in attachment—a death grip on life. Fixating on how we want the world to be and trying to make it stay goes against the natural grain. That tightness and the sense of claustrophobia it creates is “me.” Our negativity gives us something to hold on to. We think that if we hold on tight enough, we can manipulate the world to make “me” happy. We’ve tried being angry and desirous hundreds of times. Has anger ever brought genuine happiness? Has desire ever resulted in long-lasting satisfaction?

Who is it that we are protecting with our anger? Who are we trying to get more for with jealousy and desire? The reason that we can't make “me” happy is that there is really no one behind that door. “Me” is just an idea, a concept, a myth. Essentially, it is attachment to a mirage. We're clinging to a fabrication and generating negative emotions in an attempt to protect it.

The king and queen know that happiness doesn't come from out there; it comes from in here. Getting off the “me” plan is the cause of happiness, and learning to see how “me” works is where it starts. It begins with the practice of meditation—just ten minutes or so every day. By stabilizing the mind we learn to connect with space beyond “me”—heaven. Heaven is the natural spaciousness of our mind before we make it small with self-protection. Once our mind becomes more peaceful, we begin to see how “me” is just thoughts, feelings, and emotions made solid.

In meditation practice, we learn to acknowledge and recognize our thoughts without acting on them. We’re no longer quite so fooled by appearances. Our mind becomes more flexible, because we begin to see our own projections. We begin to figure out the currency of life: it is all a display of the mind. No longer do we run after the stick of every outside appearance, like a dog. Rather, like a lion, we begin to look at who is throwing the stick—our mind.

Then we hear, contemplate, and meditate on how the mind works and how the world works. This is how we develop certainty in basic goodness. We realize that we are always hearing, contemplating, and meditating, but on a chaotic flurry of thoughts and emotions. Hearing that our friends are splitting up, we contemplate who did what to whom, developing certainty in blame. Hearing that somebody made a lot of money, we develop certainty in jealousy. Our hearing, contemplating, and meditating are haphazard, and the conclusions that we draw often lead us down the road of negativity.

This shortsighted attitude stifles our inherent energy. That natural energy is compassion—in Tibetan, nyingje, “noble heart.” In Tibetan paintings, buddhas are often depicted sitting on lotuses, which represent our innate yearning for the happiness of others. This self–arising flower is the core of our being. We need to create space in our mind in order to nurture it. The obsession with “me” suffocates it; the flower can't blossom. When we consider others, we allow the flower to bloom. Thinking of others makes our mind bigger, because it brings us joy."